There are many ways that a woman can become a single mother, and this is not the space to ask why. The blogs and Instagram memes can make single parenting look like a walk in the park, hip to some extent but the reality can be quite different. If you know a single mom, it is wise to check up on them occasionally. However, if you are looking to know what a single mome needs to make her life better, here is a list that you could refer to.
Offer them some help
Help in this case does not necessarily mean financial help, but it is one aspect to look at. A good mattress like a best queen mattress can help them sleep better. Baby showers are supposed to be an avenue to give the mama a boost through gifts that ease getting into motherhood and provide a support system. However, some friends disappear after the child is born. You can offer to run some errands for them, bring them baby care items, or even a care packaget heat will cheer them up. You can also offer to stay with them if they cannot afford a nanny so that they can have some rest and replenish their strength. This can be more than a physical gift sometimes.
They need time-outs
Parenting is considered one of the biggest blessings that peopel can receive and even with help, it can be quite overwhelming. As a single mom, one is often required to play both parenting roles for the child or children. It is a labour of love and can be draining sometimes. Finding something that can help you decompress can go a long way in maintaining the mom’s sanity and strength. This can range from reading to yoga, depending on their interests. If you are looking to date one, avoid being too clingy. The last thing they need is to feel as if they are parenting you too.
They need a support system
Many single moms really require a support system that could either be comprised of family, friends or both. The support system helps them when they are busy or sick or generally being there for them when life throws them some lemons. Good support systems help in preventing mental overloads and creating a healthy social circle for their children. As a friend of the mom, look for appropriate ways to hang out that accommodate the mom’s schedule. Choose to be there for them when they call for an urgent babysitting session. It goes a long way.
They need you to keep your judgements to yourself
You cannot imagine the overall judgement that comes with single parenting. People are always asking inappropriate questions like where the father of the baby is or why they are not present. These are questions that are very personal and asking them feels wrong because people are often looking for answers so that they can know how to judge the single mom. Offering unwarranted advice or asking the questions is very rude and can make people uncomfortable.
They need constant encouragement
Apart from being present for your single mother friend or family member, never cease to give them encouragement. It could be something as small as changing a diaper or helping a child get ready for school once they are old enough. For the younger single moms, having a child might end up feeling like an ending to their youth. It is not, so encourage them to complete their education, to apply for scholarships, and even to go for new jobs or higher positions. Helping them could go a long way in boosting self esteem.
As mentioned, there are not enough articles or videos that can prepare you for parenting which is why it is important to have a support system. As a single mom, it is okay to accept help from those offering it and not always viewing it as a form of charity. Some occasions call for minimal pride to help you manage your life as a parent and a worker or a student or all three. Your child is your bundle of joy so allow yourself to feel that joy.